Je suis partie aujourd’hui
Les soins palliatifs à domicile ou le dernier train avant le bleu du ciel par Franca Maï
Franca Maï : Fleurs vénéneuses extrait Crescendo (vidéo)
Le "cyberknife" m’a laissé quelques beaux moments de répit et un jour ensoleillé du mois de juillet, nous avons réalisé Sirieix et moi-même, ce petit court-métrage, intitulé "Fleurs vénéneuses", adaptation d’un extrait de mon roman "Crescendo" paru au Cherche-Midi en 2009.
Malheureusement, le "cyberknife", protocole agressif lancé contre le crabe n’a pas fonctionné. La tumeur est toujours là. Aussi grosse et... légèrement nécrosée. Pas assez pour un joli sursis.
Je ne remonterai pas sur le ring.
Plus de trois ans que je mène une bataille dure et intense.
Main dans la main avec les êtres chers.
Cette saleté est plus forte que moi.
J’ai décidé de fermer les yeux parmi les miens. J’ai demandé les soins palliatifs à domicile. C’est mon dernier voyage. La ligne droite sans filet.
Je vous embrasse tous, amis(es), e-torpediens (nes), vous m’avez apporté tant de Bonheur.
Franca Maï co-fondatrice du e-torpedo.net et romancière
Extrait Crescendo p 163/164
Elles sont comme cela.
Elles ont des fleurs dans la bouche qui s’ouvrent et se referment au gré d’un rien. Les lèvres humides se détachent parcimonieusement suivant le rire éclatant du vent, laissant entrevoir leurs petites dents nacrées, happeuses d’écorchures. Leurs pensées délabrées les épinglent en douceur dans un sommeil léger ou profond, tout dépend de la vitesse du train.
Et souvent, elles s’offrent à mon regard. C’est pour cette raison que j’aime tant voyager. En réalité, je n’ai nulle part où aller, je me laisse porter par mes errances, billets froissés dans la poche pour accéder à d’autres rails inconnus ou apprivoiser le trajet en sens inverse. Tout dépend de mon humeur. J’ai toujours un mal fou à repérer celle qui pourra satisfaire mes lubies, le jardin des fleurs étant si vaste, si coloré, si prometteur !...
Quelquefois, elles se télescopent en pétales vénéneux faisant place à un énorme trou humide dans lequel je ne trouve plus ma place.
Lorsque je ressens cette sensation, je suis en rage. Des suées et des transpirations mouillent mon corps, collant inconfortablement mon pantalon à même la peau, tout en entravant ma marche. Je dois calmer mes nerfs entre deux wagons sinon je rate le plaisir sacré et c’est un voyage pour rien.
Je n’aime pas gâcher ma semence.
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